“Show your Money some Love this Valentine’s Day”

I know what you’re thinking: “What a romantic topic for Valentine’s Day!”  However, there is good reason to talk about finances on a day normally dedicated to romance and that’s because money matters are one of the main reasons that couples break up or divorce.  So, an ongoing discussion about your finances can sometimes work to keep the romance alive or at least ensure some (normally) difficult topics are being brought to the surface.  Just like us as humans, our finances change and it’s important that we take the time to show our current (or future) loved ones that we care for them by taking our money matters seriously.  In this post we take some time to highlight money conversations that current or future couples should consider having.

Where Do We (I) Want to Be in 10 Years?

Is it a cliché question that we normally reserve to be asked in job interviews?  Sure.  However, answering this question from a financial, family, and career standpoint can be a great exercise for newly dating couples or married veterans to engage in.  Whether this an individual plan (for our single readers) or one crafted as a couple, it’s important to know that if we don’t have a destination in mind then it’s really tough to start setting goals or put a strategy in place.  The answer doesn’t have to be groundbreaking.  In fact, your destination might be “doing what we’re doing today!”.  How great is that?!  At least you’ve discussed the topic and let each other be heard.  Also, don’t let divergent answers scare you or make you think the relationship is off track.  The goal here isn’t perfect unison, but rather an opening to explore your deeply held hopes and dreams for your future.

What Do You Most Enjoy Spending Money On?

Not only is this a great way to discover (or re-discover) what your significant other is most passionate about, it also shows you how the other person classifies needs, wants, and luxuries.  From personal experience, this question led to us recently making the decision to cut cable from our monthly expenses.  Neither my wife nor I really get fulfillment out of watching television so our return on investment (ROI) for having this bill every month was extremely low.  We can now take that same money we were spending every month and direct it towards things that truly bring us happiness. A second step to this question which can also be fun is to compare your lists of what you most value and consider whether it’s feasible to eliminate items that didn’t make it onto either of your lists.

What Causes Do You Most Enjoy Giving To?

For couples who’ve just recently started dating, this can be a really great way to get to know the heart behind your boyfriend/girlfriend.  For couples who’ve been married for some time, it can be a refreshing way to take the focus off of cutting back your expenses and instead think about the people or causes you most want to help.  Once you’ve both had a chance to share, take the time to learn about what the other person is interested in and consider finding time to give your time and resources as a couple. 

Money might not be the first topic that comes to your mind this Valentine’s Day, but make sure you carve out some time to have money discussions with your significant other.  For our single readers, think about how you would answer these questions for yourself and consider yourself equipped with some deep questions when you do meet that special someone.